Saturday, November 17, 2012

My most ridiculous (first world) problem yet!

Regular readers know about my whole "non-milestone milestones" concept.  It's basically just the idea of Things that don't fall into the category of round numbers and Big Signs.  I.e., Lost 20 pounds!  Changed a clothing size!  Hit my wedding weight!  Those things are all legitimate milestones, right?  So how do you categorize things like "switched to a new row of hooks on my bra"?  Well, you call it a non-milestone milestone, is what you do.

So, you know about the non-milestone milestones concept, and you should also know  that I've said many times that I realize these "problems" I've come across due to weight loss are truly first world problems.  But this week I sunk to a new low.  I am now complaining about my sleeves.  Yes, sleeves.  I am an embarrassment to society.

I have several tops -- sweaters, sweatshirts, long sleeved t-shirts ... whatever -- that actually still fit.  Or fit now and didn't before, or just look way better now than they ever did before.  So what am I complaining about?  It took me several days in a row of pushing up my falling-down sleeves during dinner prep to figure it out.  Either my arms have actually gotten smaller or these shirts just have big cuffs.  Or something.  Because when I push my sleeves up on these shirts, they don't stay "up"!  Which is kind of a pain when you're washing dishes or stirring chili, or even if you're just warm and want a little less fabric covering your forearms.  If you'd asked me 6 months ago, I'd have said my forearms didn't really carry any fat.  My wrists looked the same to me as they always had, and I wouldn't have thought there was extra weight there.  I was wrong.  And now most of my sleeves are falling down :)  I even have an elastic bracelet that fits differently.  And by "fits", I mean "doesn't cut off my circulation when I wear it".  So yeah, I've lost weight in my forearms.


Lest it sound like all I do is complain, I do have a happy non-milestone milestone to say "Yay!" about:  Boots!  Last year (and honestly, for the 2 or 3 years before that) I attempted to get a cute pair of boots to wear.  I was pinning them on Pinterest, I was ordering them from Zappos (free shipping on returns!), and none of them fit.  I can't even tell you how many pair of boots I ordered -- maybe 15? 20?  All labelled "wide calf", and almost none of them fit.  The few that did actually zip looked awful.  I decided last year, sadly, that I was actually too fat to wear cute boots.  Which was sad in and of itself because let's face it; the last bastion of cute things for fat girls is shoes.

"Clothes never look any good... food just makes me fatter... shoes always fit."

Jennifer Weiner
In Her Shoes

But THIS year, I thought I'd try again.  Why not?  I'm not my parents' most stubborn child for nothing!  So I ordered another 5 pair -- still staying in the "wide calf" genre -- and ... THEY ALL FIT!!!!!  I'm serious!  Every single pair fit me!  After picking myself off the floor and sending pics of them to my fashion squad via group text, I selected some to keep.  So maybe it's not a big round number (like "I'm down 50 pounds!"), but wearing cute boots was one of my fashion heart's desires, and now I can.

Those sleeves totally fell down after this pic
I'm on the left. It's OK to laugh :)
So here's a pic of me in said boots, AND a bonus pic from the summer of 1985 or 1986.  Why?  Because I'm wearing "skinny jeans" with my new boots, and the other pic is the last time I wore "skinny jeans".  Except we only called them "jeans" then (sometimes peg-leg pants).



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